Victoria Justine Cloete

If you would ever get so lucky to sit and have a long in-depth conversation to anyone over 80 you’ll discover that such a person had gone through a lot of highs and lows. They’ll also tell you about all the amazing surprises life has bestowed on their way and that how your   rock-bottom will turn into something beautiful . Older generations, in general, have such beautiful stories to tell about survival because they've lived through it all.  But first, let’s talk about rock-bottom. What is rock-bottom? In my opinion, rock-bottom is a feeling where you think you've reached the end – but as they say, thoughts are not facts . My rock-bottom will look completely different from your rock-bottom and so will yours be different from mine. We all go through difficult experiences in life and they don’t all look the same . A few months ago I felt super annoyed and miserable when I realized that after years of hard work my poor little blog was still not visible to those that matt...

Time for another “Life Lately” post, because you know what I owe it to you, my blog supporters. In my previous update,  I was having a little rant about being overlooked by PR and so forth. That post, believe it or not, brought me so much joy because I’ve felt this intense sense of rejection around the subject for such a long time. I so badly wanted to say something, I wanted to voice my opinion but I was too scared. For what? I guess for more rejection. However, since getting it out there a huge sense of relief filled my soul, it was like “there I’ve said it.”  I mean, in all honesty, I’m not just some jealous, resentful blogger – I have been blogging since 2012 and I try to deliver excellence so in all fairness this rant was mine to have and take and it felt good! I did realize that I should work on my stats as that’s ultimately what sells. So I’m shifting the blame and I’m starting from scratch . What is it that I need to work on? What do I want from my blog? I...

I’ve been going back and forth, started and restarted and yes you can say that I really struggled to write this blog post on  Part 2 of My Sobriety Journey . Read Part 1 here. I just didn’t have anything really to say or rather that was worth writing about. Until now. On the 23rd of March 2019, I celebrated my one year anniversary of being sober , therefore I think now is the right time to continue this 2 part series.  But first, let’s go into how it affected me being in social gatherings. When I decided to stop drinking there was no special treatment for me at all. People didn’t tip-toed around me at all, they’d sit next to me and open their icy cold beverages and guzzle it away right in front of me.  God, it was hard, and I felt everything in slow-motion. The clicks and clangs of beer bottles when opened, the way the bubbles would surge to the opening and I could always imagine tasting that first few sips. They are always the best. I could feel the cr...

In recent years I have not been a hard drinker. (Insert cough.) Just before I completely went sober I was into what some may call "sophisticated drinks." Like cocktails and craft beer and my favourite, a spicy merlot. However, I must mention that I did go through the gin phase and I’ve indulged merrily in the 1-liter beers that came onto the recent scene.  OMG, who am I kidding I loved alcohol and there was always something for every occasion. Something tangy and crisp on a hot summer’s day and something stronger like a premium brandy on a cold winter’s night. I started drinking around the age of 16 and gave up alcohol at 34 and the only time I went sober before that was when I was unemployed during my early 20’s and then again when I fell pregnant. The first time I went alcohol-free was for 8 months, and like mentioned - I was unemployed and without any clear direction at that point. Early 20’s summaries a time when I had lots of heartaches in the romance depar...

Milania is a charming and charismatic little girl, unlike me who’s aloof and on guard all the time. I look at her and know that because of her lovely and lovable characteristics her life will be a little easier. Not saying there won’t be backstabbers or tragedy in her life, that will change her sunny disposition, life happens and you have to take the good with the bad. But I sure wish and pray with all my heart that she’ll keep these 4 traits close to her heart and that she’ll never change them.  1. Non Discrimination I love the fact that she sees no colour, and where it’s striking and in contrast with her own she just looks upon it as unique and beautiful. I see it in the play areas of family restaurants like my local Wimpy and Spur, how she plays and interact with different races (since she’s not in school yet) and it makes my heart happy. I don’t want people to discriminate against her tall frame, curly hair and olive skin. I don’t want society to make fun of her Na...

During the festive season, I've been doing a lot of reading and soul searching, trying to figure out how I should live my life now that I'm a mother, married and getting older. I really want to treat 2018 with as much respect as I can, by that I mean honoring each day, eating healthy and basically just trying to be as open as I can be to receive and accept transformative information. That and a few other rituals that will make my 2018 life changing! 1. Eating Healthy To me nutrition means having loads of fresh fruit and vegetables, mostly having big salads sprinkled with seeds and nuts. I’m also into giving superfoods like goji berries, macha powder and chia seeds a try. It’s not just about blindly following new trends but about making informative decisions. We live in a highly scientifically developed world so we should try out some of its findings. I’ve also been trying to stick to the Blood Type diet and being Blood Type O I’ve seen the somewhat terrible ...

My little girl will celebrate her 2nd birthday this coming January, I can’t believe it at times but it’s true. Like they say the days are long but the years are short. We’re past the baby milestones like walking, teething and eating on her own. It’s been such a beautiful journey and although I can’t see myself ever going through the pain of childbirth again, I’m extremely thankful I birthed my Milania. Here’s what motherhood taught me thus far. 1. I’m blessed. I turned 31 the year I fell pregnant, meaning it was basically high time. That’s how I subconsciously planned it in my head, before that I was just not ready. I know my fellow perfectionists would agree that you’re actually never ready since you want everything to be perfect and just right. Study funds, 1st birthday party and cute bedroom all sorted and in place, well reality check! Sometimes it doesn’t work that way. So it was really hurtful as you can imagine for someone with my mindset to have heard that some p...

I remember a time when I was working at a digital agency in Cape Town , it was just after a messy breakup so in many ways I was ready for a new start in life. The setup was awesome, good coffee, lunchtime treats and huge jars of candy for when you needed a pick-me-up during the day. However, I had colleagues from hell. Correction, my female colleagues were from hell.  Most of you already know that I’m a country girl from Springbok situated in the Northern Cape of South Africa. Not that this ever bothered me (it did bother them) since that just instilled an eagerness in me to stay updated and on point with whatever’s happening elsewhere. And it has always been like this for me. My coworkers (2 females from my own race group) just assumed that this was my first time being and living in Cape Town, how wrong they were. But how do you go and tell strangers to listen up, and then list all of your past accolades and successes? That’s just so childish and also none of their ...

How are you, are the new year treating you well - maybe you're not as happy as you used to be, or maybe you just need a little push in the right direction. Well I have a little surprise for you today, I've just worked through a super awesome e-book called FLIGHT, that will help you examine the six key areas of your life, so that you can figure out how to live an authentic life true to your passions! I know a brand new year doesn't mean that everything just falls into place, right? I know that it's a process that requires time + effort.  To make a success of 2015 and every year for that matter, you'll need to show up, be consistent and have resilience to overcome challenges. You'll need to do the work. Yes, we all know that it's a constant journey into self discovery and true joy, and that sometimes things may appear a little sticky + tight. In fact you may want to throw your hands in the air and give up entirely. Then again if you take the time to a...

I know for a fact that I am BLESSED to do one of the things I love the most in the world and get paid for it! Writing. I live for writing. I’m one of those people that prefer to write down my thoughts and feelings. Only then do I really know what’s going on in my head. I’m Carryn-Ann Nel, a senior(ish) reporter at Beeld in Johannesburg. It is the biggest Afrikaans newspaper in the country and I recently joined this publication, after working for Die Burger and Rapport in Cape Town for about 8 years. A day in the life of a journalist… is unpredictable and crazy and normally includes a LOT of coffee. It also includes listening to strangers’ stories. Because I’m a general reporter (that means I cover everything: from a horrible murder case to writing about Julius Malema to reporting on a fire to writing about my experience playing cricket with professional players) no day is ever the same. I literally CAN’T plan my day. Every day has its own challenges and its own stories and...

Social Media is the new way that we share information about all the things and projects we like + love. We are spending more and more time online, and you know what we love it. Facebook has over 750 million users while Twitter has over 106 million active accounts. With these staggering numbers it's easy to see why social media is such an awesome tool for sharing information and for creating awareness about things that matter. Like the Too Young To Wed initiative. In India, many a married woman adorns her forehead with a red bindi, or dot to celebrate this new chapter in their lives. Unfortunately some of these brides are not women... You see 39,000 young girls are forced into marriage each day. That’s roughly one child bride every 2 seconds,  and at this rate, the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) projects another 142 million more girls may be victimized by the practice by 2020.  If we do nothing 142 million girls will become childbrides over the next 10 years....